Holly & LJ

Another picture of Mommy and Lukasz

LUKASZ IS FINALLY HERE!!!

Lukasz John (LJ) Berecz is finally here! 

Looks like Luke had other plans! Rather than hanging out until Thursday morning and being induced, he decided he was ready to come on Wednesday. 

I actually had a busy work day, with a few client requests I figured I'd do my best to honor. Earlier in the day, I had some bleeding and called my doctor. She said it was most likely from being examined the day before and said to keep her posted on any other changes. My hips were so achy I found it hard to even walk around all day. I called Steve at work around 11:30 and told him that I just felt "weird" and I suspected that the baby was NOT going to wait until morning. I thought it would be a good idea if he did the errands he had wanted to do that day and get home in the afternoon. 

I finished up my work project around 2pm and decided I'd lie on the couch and try taking a nap for awhile. I hadn't been lying down for more  than 15 minute and I felt a really weird "pop" lower down in my abdomen, followed by a pretty severe cramp (contraction.) I didn't think much of it until I stood up and went to the bathroom. Half way there, I felt a nice warm rush and knew it was time to get in the car! I called my doctor and she confirmed I should get to the hospital. 

We were settled in our room at the hospital by 3pm. I wasn't really having contractions, but rather just a really "weird" feeling that I knew was different than anything else I'd ever felt. Contractions started mildly shortly after I got comfortable  in bed. It was confirmed that my water had broken, so they started pitocin to help things along. Well, I don't know that I really NEEDED that much help. After that, contractions started coming hard and fast. It felt like minutes and I was ready (Oh god was I ready!) for an epidural. They were so surprised that things progressed so quickly. I got comfortable and Steve headed downstairs to have a bite to eat. By the time he got back, I was at 9 centimeters and they said I'd be ready to push very soon! It's estimated that I actually went from 2 to 7 cm dilated before I ever got the epidural. I'd say by my experience, I'd agree! Let's just say I have a whole new outlook on pain. 

When Steve got back, it was time to work with our LDR nurse and start pushing. It didn't take long. We actually had to stop pushing and waited for the doctor for 20 minutes. Once she got there, one push cycle was all it took! He came so quickly! From start to finish, the process took only 6 hours. Lukasz was born at 9:04 pm pacific time.

Steve did a great job of helping out, encouraging me to push, cutting the cord, etc. He was actually fascinated by the whole thing- God bless him! I didn't even want to know what was happening. I spent  most of the time with my eyes tightly closed! I remember little things here and there, but the truth is I was totally out of it during the hard labor. All I can say is an epidural is an AMAZING thing. Amazing. 

The next day or so in the hospital is an utter blur. Between the parade of people in and out of the room and recovering, everything runs together. We got to come home yesterday (Friday). And LJ went to the doctor for his first check-up today. He's got a bit of jaundice, so we head to the lab again tomorrow for some bloodwork. 

So far, we're all adjusting well. I don't expect what we're going through is any different than every other family. We're tired, exhausted in fact. But Lukasz is such a little blessing. Having my parents here is a godsend. It is so helpful to have two extra sets of hands to help around the house and feed us! Frankie is doing his best to adjust. He doesn't do well with visitors, in general, so we have the added challenge of making him behave with Grammy and Pappy AND get used to the new "animal" in the house. He was extremely curious at first, but he's trying hard to get used to it all...I can tell. He'll come around. It's only been 24 hours. I think it will take some time. He gets upset when Lukasz cries, but we expected that. And, truthfully, he's not a very fussy baby....YET! 

We're getting the hang of everything, but we can tell we've got a steep learning curve ahead of us. When that little guy looks up into our eyes, our hearts melt and we know that EVERYTHING is going to be okay. We're so proud of little LJ. He's the best thing that's ever happened to us. The answer to our prayers! 

Update: LJ's Birthday!

Good news today! The doctor said I'm 75% effaced and 2 cm dilated. So, if Lukasz doesn't come on his own, we'll induce on Thursday! YIPPIE!!!! It won't be long now! 

Steve and I are guessing that this means he's going to decide to come tonight. Steve predicts 3am. We shall see! 

Either way, it's good to know that the end is in sight. And luckily, my parents (who arrived on Saturday) will still have plenty of time to spend with their new grandson. We should be settled at home well before Thanksgiving. We have much to be thankful for! 

D-Day has come....

Will it go without LJ making an appearance? We shall see! 

Last night, in the night, I had some cramping and back pain. I got very excited. I guess the good thing here is that I'm no longer fearing the pain. I WANT the pain, because that means he'll soon be here! 

But, I fell asleep, the pain went away, and I'm feeling okay this morning. A bit tired...a bit lethargic...a bit "heavy." But overall I still feel fine. 

We see the doctor this afternoon. We're just hoping she'll report a change! Fingers crossed! 

39 Weeks and Counting

We really need to take some pictures! We were on such a roll and had done such a great job of our weekly documentation. These days, things seem to be a bit too chaotic to think about photos! 

I recently signed a brand new client. Not my intention...as I'd prefer to be winding down instead of picking up  more work! But it's a great opportunity to work with a well-known architectural and fashion photographer, helping him promote a show he's got coming up this spring. It's very exciting! And I am sure that once my baby is born and I get back into things, professionally, I'm going to be totally excited about it! I've finally gotten myself to a good "stopping point" work-wise. And after a few phone calls tomorrow, I am going to pack it in and turn all of my attention to preparing for Lukasz to arrive! 

I've learned that I don't know a thing about how to know when your baby's going to be born! I would have sworn that LJ was going to come early. I really believed it. I have no idea why or what made me think this, but I was convinced he'd arrive before now. Alas...at 39 weeks and two days, still no sign of his arrival. 

We had our appointment with Dr. Grouse today. And while we got a good report, there is no real indication that labor is near. She did say that he appears to have dropped a bit compared to last week. But still no change in dilation or effacement. 

We have accepted that fact that he just might stick around in there awhile. Maybe he's waiting for Grammy and Pappy to arrive on Saturday? That must be it! In any case, it really can't be long now! Steve and I have shifted to a lower gear and are just trying to relax as much as we can, knowing that when he's ready, he'll be here. 

Overall, I am feeling fine. Compared to some stories I've heard, I think I've been blessed. I wouldn't say I am miserable at all. Uncomfortable at times. Tired. But overall and for the most part, I feel pretty good. I'm still able to go out and about....shop...clean....work...etc. Steve isn't letting me drive anywhere alone from here on out- convinced that I could go into labor while behind the wheel! It's okay with me. The only place I really want to go is the nail salon for a pedicure! Reaching my toes is a challenge. It can be done...strategically. But it's not the most fun thing to do. Neither is putting on shoes that don't slip on. Had an interesting experience with that the other morning on the way to our car seat inspection. 

That's another story! We thought we had done a pretty good job of installing it. While we wouldn't have exactly put the baby in danger, we didn't exactly have everything as it should have been. I'm vowing to write a book after all of this is said and done to give REAL AND ACCURATE advice to first-time clueless moms like me! For example...make an appointment (early!) with your local police department to have your car seat inspected. Don't spend $20 on a car seat protector for your leather seats. The car seat doesn't fit as securely. Instead buy a roll of $2 shelf liner. It does the same job. Also, just because your car seat is cool, streamlined and stylish doesn't mean it's "perfect." Ours came with funky pads on the shoulder straps that they suggested we remove, as using them put the clasp in the "wrong" position and would leave baby not as secure. What the heck did we know? (It's still pretty cool and stylish, though! :-) ) 

I can't wait to see how much of what we bought and received is virtually useless. My guess is that it's way more than we think! 

Reflections of a Mama-To-Be

With 15 days between now and my "official" due date, I can't help but think about how quickly the time went by. It's hard to believe that a year ago we were still hoping and praying for a miracle. And now he's almost here. I wonder how one person can have felt so much anticipation and desire to have a baby, yet feel so completely unsure about introducing him into their life. I'm assuming that this is normal "new parent jitters," and I'm going to run with that idea because it comforts me. But the truth is, I have moments of genuine terror. 

I imagine all new mommies, and daddies too, feel this way. But maybe once that little bundle of joy is placed in your arms, it all melts away, and you forget you ever questioned  yourself as a parent. I'm subscribing to this theory as well since I find it equally comforting. 

It's no secret...Steve and I aren't the most unselfish people. It's not that we're not kind. It's not that we don't care about others. But I don't think many people would argue with with us if we said we were a bit ego-centric. We like things our way. We have our methods. We are finicky. We are stubborn. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried about how a baby will fit into our lifestyle. 

If I had a dollar for every time I heard "Oh, just  you wait!" "Have your fun now!" "That will all change as soon as the baby's born" I could retire tomorrow. The thing is...we HAVE been waiting. We HAVE been having fun. We plan to assimilate this child into OUR lives, not create an entire new one when he arrives. And of course there will be changes. There have to be. But we are still who we are. And I don't think that will ever change. Nor do I want it to. 

I do worry about the fact that in one single moment, I will cease to be the "single most important thing" in Steve's life and he will cease to be the same in mine. This new person is going to come into the picture and take that place...for both of us. But that's a miracle, isn't it? And I have a feeling we both have enough love to go around. 

I worry about getting used to the cries. (I will.) I wonder if I'll always know what to do. (I  won't.) I wonder how I will deal with the lack of sleep.(Same as every other parent.)  I hope I'm a good mom and I teach him to be a good person. I hope he's strong, independent, confident, kind, sensitive, inquisitive, respectful and grounded. I hope he grows up knowing he can do ANYTHING and be ANYONE he wants to be. He doesn't have to be the smartest, the most handsome (though if you ask Steve that's a foregone conclusion), the best athlete, or the "best" at anything. As long as he gives his best to everything. 

I hope he likes his ornery puppy dog, Frankie, and that Frankie takes to him like he has Steve and me. I hope he gets to spend lots time with his grandparents and cousins and learns that family isn't the most important thing in life...it's the ONLY thing in life. 

Most of all, I hope he is healthy and happy and that someday he will be proud of his mom and dad. Someday he'll understand the things we went through to get him here, and he'll know that he was dreamed about and loved long before he came along. 

My wish for my son is that he enjoys his life, tries new things, takes adventures, finds a soul mate, makes his dreams come true and always knows he has the love and support of his parents who love him, and each other, more than anything. 

Week 37: Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween! It's hard to believe it's the end of October! Time is going so quickly and Lukasz will be here before we know it! 

We headed to a local pumpkin patch this week. It felt a bit strange, though. It was hot as can be. Steve even wore shorts and flip flops. Nice and all, but there was just something weird about not having an overcast sky and wearing sweaters. Especially after seeing that they had snow flurries "back home!" 

Saw the doctor on Halloween. No changes since last week. Nothing at all. Still 50% effaced and about 1cm dilated. Felt incredibly exhausted early in the week. But started feeling better come Thursday. Managed to do some shopping on Friday. Completed my "to get for the baby" list. I thought he needed some more socks, some extra crib sheets, a rubber ducky for the bath and a docking station for his iPod. I made a playlist for him already, including the Celine Dion lullaby cd from Jen and Claire and his "Fight on State" lullaby. 

I put together his Exersaucer over the past two days. Yes! Two days! Not only is this a "fun and educational" toy for the baby, but it was quite the adult puzzle! I feel enriched after the experience. 

Batteries. Forget the amount we'll spend over the next two years on diapers. What about batteries? I've already made two trips to the store for bags of batteries. And we all know that batteries don't last forever! Nor are they cheap! 

Now that November 1 is here, we know Luke will definitely be a November baby! It's hard to believe that by the month's end, we'll have one more member of our family. Will he make it to November 18 when Grandma and Grandpap are here? Will he come early? How will "big brother Frankie" like having a new baby around? So many questions. We'll have the answers soon enough! 

Next up... Christmas! 

Decorating, shopping and planning for the holidays should be "interesting" with a newborn! 

A California Pumpkin Patch

The Pumpkin King

Fall 2008